Last Friday I did my volunteer bit, and was able to work on Sooley Base for a few hours – in between customers. Put my assorted notes into the huge, new draft that has the newest timeline. I need to incorporate the separate chapter segments … then cut it into sequential parts again, more manageable ones for me to edit in WORD.

Also received some helpful inputs from a friend who is reviewing all of Golden Gate ©. His inputs have been very useful in editing word usage, punctuation and word choices in a few spots. I came up with the final few paragraphs of Sooley Base ©, and think I’ll work on first part of that novel, and give it to him. Hopefully he can determine if it passes the reader part … flow, successful connection to the end of Golden Gate ©, and editorial needs.

Have modified the way the various organizations, agencies, countries, and military units are described. They are now grouped individually by their particular calling, in a timeline reflective of their actions, analyses, and responses to the other characters. The glossary is progressing slowly, and the plan is to place it at the end of Sooley Base ©. Pointers from the actions within one group, military unit, et cetera will be inserted. These will identify the need to insert clues, hints, lead-ins that tie the separate groups together in the developing overall timeline.

 Good news, for me – I’ve finished consolidating all the segments into four sequential components. They cover what are estimated as Chapters 1 – 10; 11 – 20, 21 – 30, and 31 thru 40. Now the really hard work of constructing believable characters and a good floow to the story.

Yesterday waded through the pond that is Golden Gate ©, stepping across from lotus leaf to lotus leaf, adjusting the flower petals as RWG members had suggested.  All he way through mind you! I removed italicizing on Arabic personal names, and developed a glossary of Arabic terms. One character had his name changed, but not to protect his innocence. Grammar, punctuation and dialogue were improved … or so it is hoped. I verified all chapter segments included copyright info in the document properties. To be sure I had incorporated those suggestions I scanned it again, making more improvements.

A proposal to the RWG Programs Chair to let a local young author be one of the guest speakers at a future RWG monthly meeting was submitted. Hope it works, as she would give a new slant and freshness to RWG.

Today back to the segments on Sooley Base ©, and putting my scraps of paper brainstorm segments into the new WORD document which better displays the flow of the storyline. Let’s hope this sleight of hand works.

Repositioned all segments of previous Sooley Base chapters 1-5 into new format segment. Will have to do this with other five chapter segments, then renumber and split into new timeline flow, with new chapterization. I’d guess this will take a week, what with other tasks.

Summary of critiques from RWG members following reading at Borders café 2/14/11. Reading was of fifth revision of Golden Gate ©.

Most inputs have been or are in the process of being incorporated.

Generally supportive comments were received. Samples are noted below

            Good work! You create great word pictures.

            Good detail about the mountains

            Interesting! – of red rock city

            Good use of “robe suggesting that one sentry no longer lived.”

            Loved the imagery of start of chapter two

            Liked the action at – “The man responded gutturally …”

            Good story so far, very romantic

            Good image! Informative

           

Editorial, administrative suggestions

Reduce any repetitive use of adjectives, nouns, and but.

Use more direct wording.

Split paragraphs whenever speakers change.

Do not need to italicize names of Arabic characters.

Be consistent about tense.

Use more dialogue.

Incorporate gestures

I rejected several suggestions:

1)      Changing names of Amir and/or Amrah as being too similar in sounds. Amir

means Prince, while his daughters’ name means Princess. I consider those

particular names necessary to describing their characters status.

2)      Telling more of “red rock city” or naming it (Petra). Doesn’t fit here (yet)

3)      Asked to incorporate Arabic

4)      Many minor, such as adjectives used

5)      Adding explanation why all characters speak in English

6)      Too much explanation about the Bedouin tribe – sets the stage

I noted to group that shortly, within six or seven chapters, the story (as read) would jump by about 2000 years. I also asked the group, “Am I the only one who types with just one finger?“ No one admitted it, but I have my sources … and truth will out!

Incorporate novel page numbers being read for future readings. Ensure page numbers are legible.

Let me add that author Pamela K. Kinney, recent guest speaker at RWG monthly meeting sent five e-mails with enormous quantity of helpful e-publishing information.

Late notes from the recent Virginia Writers Club (VWC) conference and Board of Directors meeting at Mary Washington – The guest speaker, in fielding a question from an audience member …noted, “You just gave me the theme for another chapter.”

I met a charming retired Navy vet, with a baseball cap noting participation in WWII, Korean and Vietnam wars. I asked where in Nam he served. It was off the coast on a cruiser, so no common experiences surfaced. LCDR Edgar E. “Ed” DeLong, USN Ret gave me his business card, which was printed on both sides. I’m not sure if the double sided printing is effective. It did, however, allowed one full side of testimonials from Navy vets or those into Naval History.

I have revisited and revised my beezness card several times along the way, incorporating a photo with the words. My son said to remove extraneous ideas, so that was done, plus I shrank the photo and incorporated the blog link and G-mail address. I also reversed the photo image; it is still not good, as the figures’ eyes still looks off the card in the wrong direction. 

RWG meeting of 12 February 2011 – Here are my notes from the RWG meeting and presentation by guest speaker and author, Pamela K. Kinney pamelakkiney@verizon.net

Old business, funds report, then new business – all with appropriate moves, seconds and affirmative votes. The Executive Committee will put together and present a budget. Love those Roberts Rules of Order. I passed on buying a copy of the offered anthology.

There was extensive discussion of guest speakers and plans for their participation.

New business included meeting new members. One had been a previous member; Rob was a retired US Navy SEAL, and writer. He specializes in Security issues and some new (old) ideas to foster peace in the world. Another new member is a local doctor who writes medical articles from the local Free Lance Star newspaper. After these introductions other members gave updates on their marketing of poetry and short articles. I signed up to provide September snacks.

The Festival of the Book is coming up in Charlottesville, VA, with many authors, publishers expected. It will be a good place for networking. It will fill an entire week, with Saturday (at the Omni Hotel) the big day. 

Notable quotes to remember, and ideas for books – “My mind is gone and my memory is shot!”   “I can’t go, I’ve been screwed!”

I provide one RWG member with advise on setting up a blog, and advised members how to incorporate copyright wording into the “Properties” of WORD documents. It seemed a new thing.

Guest speaker – Pamela K. Kinney, author and writer of ghost, paranormal, even erotic paranormal books, was the speaker. She was fascinating and the questions proved without a doubt that most RWG members are computer challenged. Among her titles are “Haunted Richmond” and many titles on poetry, horror, fantasy, science fiction, and writes under a pen name, Sapphire Phelan, on erotic fantasy. She says erotic works still require believable characters, plot, and flow.

She publishes via Kindle and Nook, Barnes and Nobles’ e-publishing device. One of the interesting aspects was that e-authors apparently get higher royalties, as there is less investment in presses, et cetera. The royalty she mentioned was 45 percent, which sounds great. She says each publisher has guidelines on what they publish, want, size of drafts wanted, et cetera.

Pamela noted a big e-publishing event happening in Williamsburg, VA next month. It is called Epicon 2011 and is the second weekend of the month (corresponds to RWG meeting). She suggested checking the Epicon 2011 website or Googling “Epicon.”  It will include workshops, and numbers of those involved in e-publishing and writing. Cost is $25.00 for one day, $45.00 for two days – prices at the door. EPIC (Electronically Published Internet Connection) is apparently a non-profit group associated with all aspects of e-publishing. http://www.epic-conference.com/ 

Pamela advised of another writers meeting, at the Chesterfield County library; it will include workshops and an e-book workshop, and will convene in March. Chesterfield County is just South of Richmond.

Pamela mentioned Knight Agency in Georgia as a reputable organization, with no known negative feedback from authors. Sawhame (??SP) was another publisher mentioned. Dorchester was mentioned as a troubled publisher, with allegations that authors weren’t being paid. She advised checking (Googling) “Predators and editors” to identify and avoid troublesome publishers.  She noted that membership in writing groups, and associated marketing/publishing costs are tax deductible (for three years).

Pamela said that e-publishers use the same process of reviewing drafts, but said contracts are sent electronically for signature. Some may include subsequent or later paper printing. One of her publishers is Schiffer publishing, and she uses separate websites, names, and publishers for erotic works.

Pamela provided a number of invaluable e-publishing tips.

1)      Note e-publisher quirks, if any

2)      Most publishers require drafts submission in WORD

3)      Send your query along with any draft or draft segment (per their guidelines)

4)      Websites equal blogs for efficiency

5)      If you post a work on blog or website, advise readers it is copyrighted and not to change

6)      Google Predators and editors to limit bad e-publishers - http://pred-ed.com/ 

7)      Google Fiction Writers of America for ideas on marketing

8)      E books are promoted the same way as printed books

9)      Twitter and Facebook help in advertising (as do blogs)

10)   Different e-publishers require varying draft sizes; check ahead

Pamela is available at pamelakkineey@verizon.net

RWG readings –

A vote was discussed and consensus reached to not split into separate poetry and prose review groups. Short pieces will be reviewed and critiqued first, followed by longer (prose) ones.

“A red bone” is black vernacular for a white or fair skinned person.

“Less REM than before.”

Negro Motorist Dream Book (Green book) – early guide on how to avoid

discrimination in days of segregation and Jim Crow

                    “Daddy, tell her we don’t want niggers. We want hamburgers!”

            “Endless”

            “Pity”

“My Secret Garden”

I suggested that one prose article included something I was familiar with (and responsible for) – run on sentences. One of my college Profs even suggested I might be responsible for the concept, as my sentences rambled on, on, and on.

As the day wore on my five page (2.5 pages double spaced) of Golden Gate seemed further and further from possible review. RWG is poetry focused, and the RWG Anthology sees to dominate much of their business. I was told that if I go to the Monday night Barnes and Nobles reading session … I’d get first chance. I plan to do that.

My to do list (getting bigger and more complex)

Check back to try, after second attempt (and failure) to get a response from the UMW Director of the Writing Center (is there courtesy still at UMW). If I don’t get the courtesy of a response I guess I should note that in response to the UMW query of UMW graduates and what they think of the University. The first request for comments, incidentally, had a link that didn’t work.

Check out writing forums … Check Copy Blogger … Check out UMW blogs…

Check out Epicon and EPIC websites

A new suggestion from a reviewer - work to develop seques … a more evident flow from one chapter to the next …

Come up with a list of needed revisions to Golden Gate, based on inputs, and expected need to make it longer for publication. Define both Tooley’s and Amir’s characters better.

Posted on Facebook –

“Just burned CDs documenting my kids' ancestors from New Mexico. That project was a bright shiny object which deflected my walk across the icy sheen of the pond where novels spring forth.

Saw an ad on Facebook, for a Free (downloadable) audio book by Tom Clancy, “Patriot Games.”  I might take up their offer at http://www.audible.com/ . Now a TV offer confirms the offer is for two free books, with a hitch – one must sign up for the service, and to get the free parts … cancel one’s subscription within a month. Hmm, interesting offer.

One of the spin-offs from the VA Writers Club meeting was mention of Publishers’ Weekly by Steve Watkins, author of “Down Sand Mountain.” He recommended it as a resource in identifying publishers’ guidelines and for current information on treends within different genres. I took a look and bookmarked it - for review and analysis; http://www.publishersweekly.com/pw/home/index.html Perhaps it will give me some insights into marketing The Tessera Trilogy ©.

The Publishers’ Weekly site is, indeed, awesome, providing glimpses of wazzup across the spectrum of writers, publishers, and editors.

The SCBWI website however, suggests one can access their Yahoo Groups site without being an SCBWI member. Not true! I tried and their webmistress said no deal … well, not quite in those words. I’ll not join, as I’m into adult fiction not Young Adult novels.

I embarked on a major restructuring of Sooley Base ©, using a second document to make a better timeline of the novels’ action, then cutting and pasting my other notes (which had been helter skelter plugged into my first chapter segments) into the new timeline. I’ll have to resort and flush these out, redo my chapter outline … then redo all my chapters. At least I’ll be further along and the text will be in more logical order. Then I’ll really have to work on the characters, the action … and the suspense.

So far so good, as the saying goes.

For RWG meetings, the guidelines for articles for group review is as follows: two to three pages, double-spaced.  I had planned to pick a segment quite distinct from my last segment, to get reviews on another topic/character/scene. On second thought, I believe I’ll pick the next several pages.

HMM … another shiny object appeared. It was an ad, on my blog, suggesting I’m ready to take the plunge with my Blog, of turning it into a book. See the ad below!!!

Turn your blog into a book!
Blog2Print from SharedBook turns your blog into a soft cover or hard cover book. You pick the cover, add an optional dedication, then preview and you're done. Prices start at $14.95.

I pulled out two reference sources which may help in my new approach to marketing, “How to get happily published”, written by Judith Appelbaum and published (third Edⁿ) by Plume, a division of the Penguin Group. The second source was “The Everything Guide to Writing a Novel”, written by Joyce and Jim Lavene and published by Adams Media. They each offer insights into when and how to select an agent.

I also did a quick recalculation of the pages, Golden Gate was 92 pages in 8.5 inch by 11-inch format, and I wanted to recheck my approximation as to what that equated in paperback format. It worked out to roughly 318 pages, based on size of pages for regular paper-to-paper size in a Tom Clancy paperback novel – Patriot Games. So my first effort seems to be in the ballpark for a reasonable length.

I did spend much of an afternoon taking my small, scribbled notes (I carry a notepad to write down brilliant thots as they drift through my mind, and to note the bright shiny objects as they interrupt my train of thought. I need to take these – I called them addins – and work them into the draft chapter segments I now have. My chapters don’t yet have the rough flow I need in terms of characters, dialog, and actions, but inserting these into the draft will help me work out the flow.

Another project that had crossed in my field of fire, and caused me to lose focus was publication of a research paper on the good ship Josephus. That paper,  “Passages of Josephus, Liverpool to Boston, 2 May – 7 June 1853,”documented the shipyard in Kennebunk, ME where the ship Josephus was built in 1850, identified the craftsmen who built it, details its construction, launch and first several voyages. My paternal grandfather Wm. Joseph Rowe was born on Josephus as his parents sailed from Liverpool to Boston in 1853. Additionally the paper identified the cargo, crew, and passengers on the ship as it sailed to Boston.  

How did I gain 1.2 pounds by working out?  The instructor said it must be magic!

Another comment from reader of Golden Gate … who just started reading it … “Edgy … raw.” This reader is the daughter and wife of Marines. I think she was humoring me.

I went to the Virginia Writers Club conference this past weekend. It was held at the University of Mary Washington (formerly Mary Washington College) and the guest speaker was Professor Steve Watkins, author of “Down Sand Mountain”, a Golden Kite award winner in 2009. Steve is a UMW faculty member in English, Historic Preservation and Modern Foreign Languages Department … The Golden Kite was presented by the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators (SCBWI).

Steve was very casually dressed, with his shirt out and only sort of buttoned – it was  casual Saturday for his speech to VA Writers. He started off his a 15 minute video of his acceptance speech for the Golden Kite Award, a national prize from SCBWI.

“Down Sand Mountain” is written for YA and he provided some insights about that audience. They will read “up” to more adult books, but not down (agewise), and he said his experience shows they read actual books, not Kindle e-books. His novel is set in the 1960s and is a “coming of age” YA novel about a young man experiencing/struggling through youth in Florida. He was a character, like many YA charactters who are deeply fallible, examining the society around themmselves, thinking they are out of step even if they are perfectly in step. He advised that YA protaganists/characters jump right off the page (with their sense of action, emotion). YA books are written from point of view/perspective of a youth, young adult – usually in first or third person. They typically are written to that point of an author’s life. First person accounts often center around self authentication, of validating time honored values. He said YA books are expected to have a happy ending. The prime chracter often starts as innocent, confused, unknowledgeable, but grows as the plot advances – to maturity, confidence, self assurance …but still occasionally fallible. YA books are lots of action, with few flashbacks (can’t go back to diaper land – my words). They are dialog driven, without “rumination” (self analysis).

He mentioned the Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter and the obvious occasions of just sitting around the campfire thinking. Fantasy is perhaps the dominant genre. The Number One draw for YA books …. Is SEQUELS!!!. Publishers love to ride fast, profitable horses.

YA books are not prohibitted from using the F word, but it must be called for in the context of the character and scene. Political correctness is a factor, but the wors must match the times and locations … the society in which the story evolves. Candelewick Press wasn’t insistent about PC wording, as the Sixties were another whole world. “If you have to … “ covered the issue of words which would not be acceptable today.

Book review and editing process … This included his wife (who he remarked humorously gave him three pages of “suggestions.” first and second readers, then others whose reviews, and hos book updates become like the dance of a swan around the campfire (my words). Steve mentioned like a “death trance…” He noted finally that as his novel was historical fiction the copy editor had him adjust certain scenes to ensure the phases of the moon he had written of … were factual.

Book titling process – for two full years the authors title was XXX, then for six months it became Sand Mountain, then in final countdown it became “Down Sand Mountain.”  The final title was driven by some “Proof editor” suggestion.

Contractual areas – his contract had an option clause covering “his next work. At signing for his first the publisher asked him, “What are you working on now?” He wasn’t working on another, but soon started.

An audience member asking a question, and he smiled – “You gave me an idea for another chapter.”

Insights noted not associated specifically with the speakers’ Young Adult (YA) genre focus –

1)      Check out Candlewick Press (his publisher) as he recommends them honestly.

2)      SCBWI has a member fee of $70.00 per year and he was very glowing in his remarks of the group. He mentioned that its website has some sort of guidelines for various genres. I’ve looked them up, and submitted a request to becomne a member of their Yahoo Group site.

3)      Avoid tangential (gratuitous) action or dialog

4)      Try to identify Free or Internet based creative writing courses, or programs that will review novel drafts … I found several Universities offering free reviews and will pursue that opportunity.

He sold signed copies of his novel after the meeting. I stopped and received a referral to Jane Gatewood, UMW Writing Center Director. I was hopeful of the potential to have UMW students review my novel drafts.

I’ve come to a fateful realization, giving books away doesn’t get them in circulation, or apparently please many readers. So I’ve decide to go the commercial route … market my first book while I write the second.

It has been awhile since I was here, blogging. I’ve been entranced by a bright shiny bit of family research. I now have that data, burned to CDs and ready to mail to far distant lands … in the mill.

Now I can back to writing.